Blogatology

Now that Hollywood has managed to shed itself of the last vestige of respect for its source material — with an action-hero Sherlock Holmes whose name is about the only link to the classic literary character — the movie people are free to get really creative in maximizing the box-office potential of existing works — because Lord knows it’s a lot easier to take an existing idea and screw it up than it is to come up with something original.
And so here at the Top Ten movies just begging to be re-made if “Sherlock Holmes” is the expected hit:
10. “The Princess Bride,” directed by Roland Emmerich.
9. “Annie Hall,” starring Bruce Willis and Jessica Simpson.
8. Quentin Tarentino’s “Toy Story.”
7. Vin Diesel in “It’s A Wonderful Life.” (Advertising tagline: “Mr. Potter is about to be hit by a Diesel.”)
6. Will Ferrell and Adam Sandler are “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.”
5. “Sleepless in Seattle,” starring Nicolas Cage and Jennifer Lopez.
4. Jackie Chan and Lucy Liu in “Sense and Sensibility.”
3. Keanu Reeves in “On The Waterfront.”
2. Nicolas Cage in “Patton.”
1. Arnold Schwarzenegger in “Bambi.”

Sean Penn as one of the Three Stooges? Really? It’s being widely reported today that he’ll play Larry in a Farrelly brothers movie, with Jim Carrey in negotiations for another part (presumably Moe).

Clearly, all bets are off when it comes to casting movies these days; the more attention-getting the casting, the better. And so, we bring you:

The Top Ten casting ideas for Hollywood biopics (that would, at the very least, save us from hearing “I was born to play this role” during the junket):

10. Clint Eastwood as Woody Allen.

9. Fran Drescher as Kathleen Turner.

8. Paris Hilton as Condoleeza Rice.

7. Steven Segal as Laurence Olivier.

6. Vin Diesel as Prince.

5. David Hasselhoff as Winston Churchill.

4. Pauly Shore as Sean Connery.

3. Jack Nicholson as Elton John.

2. Tom Cruise as Steve McQueen.

1. Arnold Schwarzenegger as Minnie Mouse.